I hate plants. I mean, I'm not opposed to the whole oxygen thing that they help with, but people trying to create indoor jungles-that's what bothers me. Isn't there enough nature around us? Even in the cities, there are those weed things that grow out of the cracks in the sidewalk. And if you get really desperate, go to a park. Here I am, right by the beach. There are plenty of trees and other types of vegetation around me. Why does Anne need all these plants? I am trying hard to keep them alive, but that watering thing is difficult to remember. At present, there are several dead ones. The thing is, I don't care so much about these plants that I can't remember if they were dead when I got here or what. Also, aren't some plants supposed to turn brown at certain times? Should I keep watering them? And isn't it possible to drown plants? I wouldn't want to do that...Actually, I wouldn't really care, but Anne might. That is the main point of her wanting me to stay in her house. That, and not having to pack up everything.
For me, plants and flowers are in the same category of unnecessary things that require excessive attention for the brief period of time when they are still alive. Unfortunately, I'm a girl (I say that a lot for some reason). And people tend to want to give girls flowers. And as a girl, I'm supposed to like that. But what am I supposed to do with those flowers? Flowers are pretty until they die and turn into mulch. So you are supposed to put in them in some kind of vase which means first tearing off all of the frou frou ribbons and glittery cellophane. And then finding a vase is so complicated. Mostly because I don't have one and I tend to live at other people's houses. And other people tend to store those kinds of things on high shelves. I tend not to want to climb up to get things from a high shelf. Unless it's something good to eat. Like chocolate. Some people like to hide chocolate away from others. It's not very nice, but they do. If I have chocolate, it doesn't last long enough to get hidden. When it comes to chocolate or candy or whatever, I eat it in the moment that I want it. Because who knows if you'll ever want it more than that moment? And the enjoyment of the eating is directly related to how much you want to eat it. My Christmas candy never saw the New Year. That's ok though. I used my lack of candy as an excuse to beg from of my tender-hearted sisters.
For me, plants and flowers are in the same category of unnecessary things that require excessive attention for the brief period of time when they are still alive. Unfortunately, I'm a girl (I say that a lot for some reason). And people tend to want to give girls flowers. And as a girl, I'm supposed to like that. But what am I supposed to do with those flowers? Flowers are pretty until they die and turn into mulch. So you are supposed to put in them in some kind of vase which means first tearing off all of the frou frou ribbons and glittery cellophane. And then finding a vase is so complicated. Mostly because I don't have one and I tend to live at other people's houses. And other people tend to store those kinds of things on high shelves. I tend not to want to climb up to get things from a high shelf. Unless it's something good to eat. Like chocolate. Some people like to hide chocolate away from others. It's not very nice, but they do. If I have chocolate, it doesn't last long enough to get hidden. When it comes to chocolate or candy or whatever, I eat it in the moment that I want it. Because who knows if you'll ever want it more than that moment? And the enjoyment of the eating is directly related to how much you want to eat it. My Christmas candy never saw the New Year. That's ok though. I used my lack of candy as an excuse to beg from of my tender-hearted sisters.
